What did I miss?

Help me out here. When did what did I miss become oh, man, no buffer!? Remember the days when we had to put our life on hold for t.v.? I do. Recently I had to explain to my 10-year-old son Thomas about how it was in the old days when folks would scramble during the 2-minute commercial break to handle dog walks, snackage, laundry rotation and potty breaks. Sometimes the planning would start even before the commercial, so as to maximize its value. Inevitably, though, no matter how good the planning, one poor straggler would tear back into All In The Family hollering…what did I miss?

And if you missed a show completely!? Oh the despair! The inhumanity!

No longer. Now, it’s pause, buffer, pause, buffer, pause…or no pause, just FF or RW or that familiar Tivo sound, the one that brings music to the ears, the one that means… no commercials EVER:

gooduck-gooduck-gooduck...

...and voila…Project Runway is back…3 seconds later. What can you do in 3 seconds? Yawn? Take a sip of beer? Blink?

Rigged for Bear

Rethinking free time...what does it mean? The DVR proposes that boredom is a disease and convenience is the cure. Prescription: A recording device housing an always-open ever-filling library of hand-picked entertainment. Prognosis: no cure! Endless viewing+Endless possibilities=death by t.v.

What did I miss?

On the off-chance I do miss my favorite show, it will either come back around or I can view it on Youtube the following day. So the answer seems to be...nothing. Nothing is ever missed, because every media outlet on the warped wide web is vying to score an ounce of my streaming time, assuring me that I can view whenever, wherever I choose. And down time is no longer.

But how much television does one person need? I used to be a couch potato, tuning in and surfing til I got bored. Now, there’s no boredom, there’s just constant stimulation, marathon viewing sessions with no commercial interruptions and never-ending choices… efficient – yes, but healthy?

Tune Out. Tune In.

My husband accuses me of getting too engrossed in my shows. I tell him that’s the difference between he and I. He likes to watch t.v. to tune-out…I like to watch to tune IN, to explore and learn. Maybe it’s my theater background that compels me to analyze, compare, rewind and review. I’m looking for something greater. Something beyond me.

Isn’t it ironic, though, that with all of our technology and all the years since the invention of the wireless remote, we now have to learn how to put t.v. on hold… for life?